First I managed to buy a rare* lenovo *relative to sampled size- that wasn’t infected with superfish.
Then it turns out to be a preshus snowflake anyway because it only takes ddr3 pc3-12800 unbuffered non-ecc 1.35 volt variety-ram.
For those of you who would like to hear the suburban fantasy version:
Your unicorn only eats high altitude striped-variety moss.
Moss which grows on the south side of the doom-mountain* and even though it is called striped moss, it’s pretty indistinguishable from regular moss, poisonous-running-shits moss and hallucinogenic moss.
To find out which moss you have, feed it to your unicorn and retreat to a careful distance.
You can also purchase the striped moss variety from your friendly** wizard. Invariably they will have to order it and this may take a while, for reasons stated above.
*Ask a local what kind of mountain they live nearby, if the reply contains the words ‘doom, doomed, DOOOOOM ‘
It is a doom mountain.
** You can tell by the amount of enchanted gargoyles decorating the roof and vaguely bacon-smelling scorch marks near their abode. Lots of gargoyles plus a great many marks, better find a friendlier wizard.